A Slice of Heaven

My life has been chaos since Little Hunk arrived. It has been a train wreck of events involving a post c-section staph infection, baby reflux, and chronic car seat syndrome (a totally made up condition that involves screaming bloody murder at the slightest glimpse of the car seat....my kid has the first known case...and it's severe and terminal -for me.)



Let me go down as saying that my Hunk is the joy of my life, and I would not trade him for anything in this world. To see him laugh is the most enjoyable experience of my life. His newest phase is his "dramatic fake cough." I am so proud yet terrified of his ability to manipulate me at such a young age. That tiny cough gets instant sympathy in 0.001 seconds. He really is so much fun.



For the next week, my hubby's grandmother is in town, and it is already total bliss. She is so consumed with the Hunk, and he is loving her constant attention. Right now, I am listening to her sweet talk him while swinging him on the back porch. Every now and then I hear his adorable, totally generic cough. It is a very precious moment.



On the other hand, I am enjoying the small things in life. (Like blogging with 2 hands and taking a full shower.) I have just finished this entire post without interruption. I have never done that before. This is a little slice of heaven. Great-grandma is really great!

My Kid's Hair

My Mini Hunk was born with a head full of jet black hair. I have kind of light hair and his dad has no hair. So...after his birth the people at the hospital sort of raised their eyebrows on that one. Go figure?

Over time, his hair has lightened up. The back of it all fell out when he was tiny and rolling on his back all the time. Now, the top is LONG! He has this Donald Trump comb over thing going to keep it out of his eyes.

So, this pic is from the other night after a bath. We think it's funny...maybe you will, too.

Happy Monday Again!

Good Morning Blogsville! It's Monday again, and I was just thinking what a wonderful weekend it was. I spent some time with the family, the Mini Hunk went to his first birthday party, and we did some yard work.

Oh, and the Hunk officially has 6 teeth and is chewing solid foods. (A vast improvement from the gagging routine he has been doing.) Overall, it was a great weekend.

So, please tell me about your weekend! I would love to know!

Full Out Roaring Rant

So, I consider myself to be a fairly easy going person. When I was in the workplace, I never got involved in the the daily drama. I have always tried to leave the dramatics for the professionals of daytime television. However, I totally lost it today. Here is what went down...

It all started Tuesday night when I went for a jog with a friend of mine. (And by jogging I mean: starting to run/ panting uncontrollably/ walking/ repeat.) Anyway, I noticed that traffic was not very eager to stop for us to cross. Even when the crosswalk was flashing. Hmmm... I thought, "that's not very nice."

Well, on the way back to the house, I see a woman stuck in the turning lane trying to get across the street. Here is the kicker: the woman was in a motorized wheelchair!!!! So, okay don't stop for me, but what kind of insensitive creeps don't stop for an old lady in a wheelchair? I was appalled to say the least.

Then today, I took the mini-hunk for a walk to the post office. On the way, we walked by a church that was having cars line up for food bank donations. So, I walk by and all the senior citizens are waiting and smiling at my little one. I thought, "so sweet."

On the way back home, I am waiting to cross the road and a little, elderly lady calls from her car. She says, "I don't drive often, could you help me out?" Well, I look and there is a car waiting to turn into the church. So, I wave the lady out into the road. About that time, a young girl in a brand new SUV swings around the waiting car (across double yellow lines) and almost hits my precious old lady.

Honestly, I don't really remember saying anything. I remember thinking some pretty awful words, but I don't think I said them out loud. (I really hope not anyway!) However, I do remember pure rage pulsing through my veins, and a loud pounding in my head. I am certain that I looked just like the devil on steroids.

In response to my evil stare, the girl yells in a sarcastic tone, "I wasn't going to hit her." Then she drives on. I guess she thought it was inconvenient to wait in traffic for 3 minutes. (The small town I live in only has 2 red lights so it literally would have been only 3 minutes max.) Guess she didn't think of how inconvenient it must be to not have enough food to eat.

Just as I was about to lose all faith in this world and join a commune of some sort, a kind gentleman stopped for us to cross the street. I waved and thanked him SO profusely, I think he may have gotten the wrong idea.

Then, as I turned into my neighborhood, my sweet neighbor was putting her picnic basket in the backseat of her car. She was headed to pick up her daughter from school and surprise her with a trip to the park. She said they needed to spend some time together.

So, I decided against the commune idea (lets face it...most of them are nudist anyway...they would never let me in.)

Turns out if I look hard enough, there is some good left in this world.

Wordless Wednesday

Cheap Chick

Let me tell you, I am one cheap chick! I really hate to overpay for items...wait... I really hate to spend money in general. (Especially now that I am not working.) Lately, my grocery bill has gone through the roof. I know someone else out there can give me a holla back on that one!

So, here are my bargains of the week for this week:

1. I discovered that my local grocery store sells infant ibuprofen for less than HALF the price of the OFF brand at my local drug store. What is that about?

2. OK, in the deep south we have this chain discount store called Fred's. It's really a funny place. However, you can get 4 oz of diaper rash cream (same intensity as the expensive brand) for $1.50. No kidding!!!! It smells a little strange, but it's not like the other smells like roses. Plus, it's going down south...who cares? So, we deal with it and save around 3 bucks a tube!

3. Finally, I found baby orajel at a local dollar store for a $1.00!

I stocked up on all these items, and I feel good about not giving the Walmart monster all my money this week! :)

It's Getting Hot, Hot, Hot!

Yesterday and today have both been very warm here. It's so exciting. :) We went out walking, and I did not even have to walk very fast to work up a sweat. I felt very successful and thin afterward.

Also, I had my first yard sale of the season this morning. (Friday is a strange day, but it is supposed to rain Saturday. So, I figured if I am redneck enough to do a yard sale, why not on Friday? FYI: It did very well!) So, now I have a little extra cash. I think I am going to buy some new plants and work in my yard next week. Big stuff!

The absolute most exciting part of this weather is the change in wardrobe for the little hunk. At noon, I changed the little man into a t-shirt and little pair of cotton shorts. Last fall, he looked really skinny in shorts; however, now he is a stud! His perma-rolls (on his thighs) hang out of the little shorts, and it makes me just want to kiss his precious chub. Cute, cute, cute! I will post a pic when I pick up some batteries for the camera!

Anyway, hope the weather is nice wherever you are. Have a great weekend everyone!

It's My Party!

As much as I hate to admit it, it's my birthday again! The big 3-0 is creeping up awful quick, and I am not sure how I feel about this. At 26, I felt like it was no big deal. At 27, I was the size of a house, terrified of my upcoming labor, and did not give a rip. Now,( at 28) it is a bit concerning. If we were rounding numbers it would round right up to 30. Frightening!

I am sure a quarter life crisis (as John Mayer puts it), is a fairly common thing. But this last year has been a very intense one. What with pregnancy, a baby, the aftermath, and the science project otherwise known as my body after a baby.

However, at 4:30 this morning I had the pleasure of feeding my precious baby boy. Although I groan at his wails waking me, I really do enjoy being with him so sleepy. Deep down, I know that I should make him give up this feeding soon, but it's so sweet. He just eats and sleeps in my arms. This morning, I held him a little longer, and I thought about how fast the years pass. Maybe being 28 isn't so bad after all.

Almost Wordless Wednesday!

My baby 8 months and 15 1bs. ago! How does it happen so fast?
(By the way, we are sitting pretty at almost 21 lbs. now!)

My Verbal Boy!

So, it's official. On Sunday, my little hunk said, "Daaaadeee" very clearly. Not just once, but twice while my hubby was holding him. So precious, just melted his dad's heart.

Sure, I was a little upset that his first word wasn't mommy, but it's okay. Really, I mean, I know that I am the one that quit my job to stay home with him, but no biggie. And, I am the one who gets up during the night...sometimes 3 times a night or more. Oh, and I am the one who hog wrestles him into clean clothes around 4 times per day, everyday.

No...I am not resentful. Uh, uhh, of course not! No way! :) All joking aside.. now that I have really thought this through, I think that it's wonderful! Hmmm... maybe he will start calling for his "Daaadeee" at 4 in the morning! Hehehe.

Secret Stories Chapter 1: My Mikey

Blogsville is awesome, because you can be brutally honest. You can roll out of bed, grab some coffee, and sign in. No one knows that you are wearing yesterday's mascara in a raccoon type fashion, or that you have on your husband's sweats. Then, you get to write all the sarcastic or whimsical thoughts in your head down for people to see. It's an amazing thing.

So, this thought process brought me to begin a series of "Secret Stories." These are the stories that should never be told. Stories that would make your mother blush! And a quick warning: This story is not for anyone with a weak tummy. I apologize in advance, but I just couldn't help myself. Enjoy!

Chapter 1: My Mikey


I call my husband Mikey because he eats ANYTHING! Over the past 5 years, I have made it my job to stop him from eating bad food, stale chips, and moldy bread. (Now you see why this is a secret story!) Well, I did a pretty good job of food patrol until I got pregnant...

See, when I got pregnant, I just got downright sick. I mean, throwing up 4 or 5 times everyday for months. (Silver lining: I was pencil thin at 4 months preggers.) My doctor said it was alright, just keep eating. So, I did...and then I kept ralphing. Just opening the fridge sent me running to the loo. Food patrol was the last thing on my mind. And this is where the story gets good..

For Christmas, my school gave everyone a huge sliced ham. I thought I would die just having to take it home in my car. I put it in the way back! I made my husband put it in the very back of the fridge. He loved it.

Well, in February (2 MONTHS later), my husband came home from work to tell me about how sick he had been that day. Of course, I am secretly thrilled that someone else is sick, but I say, "Oh honey, what happened?" He continues to tell me that he was out at a vendor's warehouse when he started to feel funny. Then, he ran to the restroom to relieve himself, only to find the one potty occupied! Next, he said he just had to pass a little gas to relieve the pressure...oops...only to have one big situation. (By the way, when he told me this, I laughed my head off!)

"What did you do?" I asked in freakish delight. And get this, he says serious as a heart attack, "I did what I had to do, I cut my underwear off with my pocket knife." Hmmm...

And he says this like it is the most normal, logical solution to the problem! Then he just threw the underwear away, cleaned up, and finished out the work day. Men!!! What planet are they from? Who does that?

So, now you can guess what my Mikey had for lunch that day....Yep, you guessed it: A big, delicious sliced ham sandwich. I bet it was super tasty! :) Oh, my Mikey!

Shout Out!

I just want to send a little shout out to Tadpoles and Teacups (an excellent blog you should visit.) This amazingly artistic blogger is not only one "great aunt" to the little hunk, but she is also one of my leading role models for motherhood. (Her children are well mannered, smart, and all survived childhood to journey on to adolescence and adulthood...this is a truly amazing accomplishment in my book!)

So, head on over and check her out. Especially take note of her "blasts from the past" (these are magnificently witty stories about her own 4 kids when they were young.) Also, see what she crafts from paper pulp...yes, paper pulp. It's mind boggling! Curious???

Blogsville Blues

Yesterday, I was out in Blogsville visiting a few new blogs, and I found my self so depressed and inadequate as a mommy. I mean, I really respect all those organized and efficient moms out there, but I just can't do it.

For example, one blog was this lady who bought magnets and blogged about how she was going to redecorate her fridge junk. (You know all the pictures, invites, etc.) While I was deeply engrossed in her magnificent plan, I realized...my fridge is a wreck! I never even noticed, but now I see that it is an utter mess! (Now, I notice it everyday!) Who knew?

Then, get this: the blog ended soliciting advice on how to organize inside your fridge! Say what? Don't you go buy the food, heave it into the house, and jam it in the open spots? Is that not how you do it? Apparently, I have not thought this through! I am SO going back to the blog to get some more information about this situation.

Finally, I visited a blog of a mom who breastfeeds, co-sleeps, and other impressive stuff (that I really can't even remember now...her awesomeness was overwhelming!) Now, I did breastfeed for 6 long months, and I am glad for the nutrition and bonding it provided. However, I was very pleased to reclaim my womanhood and fit back into a bra that isn't the size of Texas. And co-sleeping...hmmm...love my little hunk, but just can't do it. I cherish my personal space, and I sleep like the aliens have abducted me. I could possibly roll over and...well, let's just say I am not a size 2 anymore and could do some damage.

Anyway, I just thought I would take a moment to find some strong points about my mothering and homemaking skills. So, here they are...

1. I almost always make my husband's lunch. (Except once or twice a week when I forget.)

2. Although I do not co-sleep, I do think about and pray for my baby (before I pass out cold.)

3. Often, I replace the toilet paper roll immediately. (Rather than just sitting the new roll on top of the empty brown cardboard ring.)

4. This one should earn me major mom points: I always, always, always carry my burp cloths to scrub the spit up from my baby, myself, my rug, my hair, his hair, the dogs, and the list goes on.... (thank-you reflux for this gift in my life!)

Well, I feel much better now. Hope you do, too!

A Delicious Wordless Wednesday

Pic of the Week: Bad Hair Day

So, I have decided that I have been blogging for around one month now, and it's high time I spruce things up! Thus, you will now see a pic of the week. Now, I warn you that I am not a normal mother who poses her baby just so for pics. I love funny pictures! Boy, is he going to hate me when he gets older! :) I call this one, "Bad Hair Day!"